Author Speed Date

The idea of speed dating is that you get 10 minutes to sit down with a prospective date and get to know them. In that spirit, we present Author Speed Date. A quick 10 minutes for you to get to know some of our clients. Today we'd like you to meet Gail Oust.

BookEnds Author Speed Date

Name (the one you’re published under): Gail Oust

Speed date Bio (one or two lines): A Yankee transplanted to South Carolina, I used to juggle my writing with a career in the medical field but now it’s writing only. I’m loving it.

Web Link: www.gailoust.com

Next Book, pub date: Shake, Murder, and Roll, May 3, 2011

Agent: Jessica Faust

About Me

Real Name or Pseudonym: Real name is Gail Oust. In a past life, I wrote historical romance as Elizabeth Turner.

Currently Reading: Books for a contest I’m judging

Next on Your Reading List: The White Queen by Philippa Gregory for a change of pace

Facebook or Twitter (include account name): Facebook as Gail Oust

Three authors living or dead you would want to have dinner with: Norah Roberts, Pat Conroy, and John Hart

Jet-setter or armchair traveler: A little of both but mostly armchair

Glass ½ full or ½ empty: ½ full when it comes to life in general but tend to be ½ empty when it comes to writing

Tea or Coffee: Coffee, coffee, coffee

Live to write or Write to live: Live to write

About My Writing

When (time of day) I write: Late morning and all afternoon

Writing soundtrack: New Age, anything with lyrics makes me want to sing along

Character Inspirations: Occasionally people I’ve met but most often they materialize out of nowhere

Plot Inspirations: The words “what if?”

Setting Inspirations: Usually places I’ve visited at one time or another

Plotter (carefully plot books) or Pantser (write from the seat of my pants): I tried being a pantser once but it didn’t work out so I’m back to being a plotter.

Social Networking: Twitter Tips

A must-read article by Media Bistro. Read carefully. I think we could all learn a lot.

The only thing I would add is to have fun with it. Twitter is supposed to be fun. Join in a conversation, share random thoughts and laugh while you’re doing it. The more fun you have the more successful you’ll be.


Jessica

Workshop Wednesday

By repeated request we've started Workshop Wednesday. It will definitely play out through 2011, and beyond that we'll just have to see. We've received well over 200 queries at this point, but we are choosing at random, so don't be afraid to participate as per the guidelines in our original post.

For anyone wanting to comment, we ask that you comment in a polite and respectful manner, and we ask that you be as constructive as possible. If you can be useful to the brave souls who submitted their query and comment on the query, that's great. Please keep any anonymous tirades on publishing or other snarky comments to yourself. This is and should remain an open and safe forum for people to put themselves and their queries out there so that everyone can learn. I'm leaving comments open and open to anonymous posters, as I always have; don't make me feel the need to change that policy.

And for those who have never "met" Query Shark, get over there and do that. She's the originator of the query critique, the queen, if you will.


Dear Secret Agent Person,

I'd like to assume that you know to use the agent's name, but since I've learned in this business to assume nothing, I'll simply remind you, and everyone, to always use the agent's name. Although this did crack me up.


Avery knows all about secrets. She’s heard them all. But some secrets shouldn’t be heard.

I liked this opening. I thought it was intriguing and it definitely grabbed my attention. The only thing I would say is that I think the writing could be stronger here. It almost has the oomph, but not quite. It feels like you're trying a little too hard.


Seventeen year old Avery Gardener can make rain in the middle of a drought. She can make a flower bloom in the dead of winter. And she could deal with those abilities a whole lot easier if it weren’t for the noise. Avery lives with a constant racket. Thoughts, secrets, dreams. You name it; it’s in her head, but none of it is her. Not once in her seventeen years has Avery been alone in her mind.

I'm still intrigued. If I received this query I would keep reading. Since I'm critiquing the query, of course, I'm going to be harder on you. The trouble is that now you're throwing a lot at the reader. Since you opened with the line "some secrets shouldn't be heard," I think it's important to lead with that information in the next paragraph. In other words, start the paragraph by talking about how she lives with the noise and make it clear that the noise has nothing to do with her own secrets, but the fact that she can hear those of others around her. A nice transition might be that her own secret is that she can make rain. . . .

The other concern is that the query seems all about her hearing other people's thoughts, but I'm also curious about these other powers she has. Do they play a big part in the story? Are they even necessary to mention in the query, or is it better to focus primarily on the secrets as a way to streamline?

I think you need to edit the sentence "none of it is her." This would be stronger if you say none of the secrets/thoughts (whatever you want to say) are her own. I do like the last sentence about never being alone in her mind.


Sebastian Caldwell knows about strange powers just as well as Avery. In fact, he claims to know more. He claims he can help with the noise. But can Avery trust him? It’s not like she trusts all that many people – not since her abusive father went to jail for breaking her arm.

This paragraph tosses a lot of information, unnecessary information, in. I think the transition needs to be that while Avery has never been alone in her mind she's always been alone with her secrets, until Sebastian comes along and knows more than anyone, including, or so he claims, how to stop the noise. I would skip the part about the father. It might be integral to the story and who Avery is, but it's totally unnecessary in the query and only bogs things down.


But as Sebastian introduces Avery to his world, it becomes increasingly hard not to believe in him, especially as she realizes he might just need her as much as she needs him. Because somebody has decided they want to hurt people with powers, and they are far from indestructible.

I don't think this is adding anything to the query, and I think this is where the query falters and where you might lose a request or two. You've built up the story and introduced the characters, but you haven't told us anything about the plot, and this is where you need to do that and you need to hit it home. My concern at this point is maybe you don't have a plot. Skip the "Sebastian introduces Avery to his world" since that bogs things down again. I wonder if there are too many worlds. Instead, I want to know what sort of conflict pushes these two together and threatens to tear them and their lives apart.


SPYDER is a young adult paranormal romance complete at 78,000 words.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,


All of these ending lines are fine.


Jessica

One Paragraph or Less

When you're writing a query, we often stress the importance of keeping it brief. Of course authors always want to know how short, because authors always want rules (and who can blame them). And while there's no rule to how short, I try to encourage writers to stick to a paragraph or short paragraph or two. Why? Because you don't want to lose your reader to glazed-over eyes.

Even the most exciting book can be made boring with too much description. I loved The Hunger Games, for example, really can't say enough about how great this book is. That being said, no one wants a play-by-play of every moment of the book. That's not going to get anyone to read it. If I want others to read this book, and I do, I need to tell them succinctly why they need to read it. What it's about in a few short sentences. I need to keep to the back cover version of the story.

If you really want to hook an agent, and later, as a published author, if you really want readers to want to read your books, you need to learn how to tighten your descriptions. You need that elevator pitch so that when you meet a potentially new reader on the ride up to your office you can get them to buy your book because they think it sounds fabulous and exciting, not like some author who either doesn't know how to describe her book or who rambles on and on and on. And keep in mind, if you ramble on and on and on, it will appear your book does too.


Jessica

LOL

It’s been a while since I’ve shared some of the laughter here at BookEnds, but the minute this came into my inbox I knew I had to pass it along:

I discovered you through reading [Your Client’s] books. I enjoy them, but I think my cast of characters to be more interesting and my story a better read.


And here's another . . .

This is one of many books I’ve written. It is not necessarily the best, I have two more as good or better . . .


And lately I’ve been getting a lot of responses to my rejections that say something along the lines of . . .

I just signed a great deal with a small press so luckily for me I don’t need an agent any more.

That’s okay, I just signed with someone else.


Jessica

Five Don’ts for Pitching Books and Manuscripts

Author Name: Krista Davis
Title of Book: The Diva Haunts the House
Publisher: Berkley Prime Crime
Pub Date: Coming September 6th
Agent: Jessica Faust

Author Web/Blog links:
http://divamysteries.com
http://mysteryloverskitchen.com
http://www.killercharacters.com

Malice Domestic Convention (http://www.malicedomestic.org/)


Mystery authors are about to descend on Bethesda, Maryland, for the annual Malice Domestic Convention, which celebrates traditional and cozy mysteries. Right about now, everyone is practicing their elevator pitches for Malice Go Round. It’s their opportunity to sit at a table with readers and sell their books. But there’s a catch -- they only have two minutes! There are twenty tables in the room with two authors seated at each table of readers. When the cue is given, each author has two minutes to talk about his or her books. Then the authors rise and switch tables. It’s exhausting but it’s also a lot of fun. I’m no pro, but I have picked up on a few mistakes that authors make. (I’ve made them, too!) Last year, when Jessica and I spoke about it, she noted that many are the same mistakes that writers make when sending her queries. Don’t let these happen to you.

1. Don’t bore them with structure.

“I based The Quintessential Murder on the hero’s journey.”

Are you bored yet? Me, too. If you’re a writer, you might enjoy discussing the structure of a book, but it doesn’t spark interest in a book for most people.


2. Don’t waste time with the obvious.

“My books are about the relationships between people and how they react to a murder in their midst.”

Doesn’t that apply to most mysteries? If you’re a New York Times Bestselling author, you could get away with this. Then again, your audience would be just as thrilled if you leaned toward them and asked if your mascara had smeared.


3. Don’t overload them with names.

“John and Mary have a complicated relationship. That’s because of Sam, who never liked his mother, Imelda, who is a difficult woman at best. So when Arthur and Hugo enter the picture . . . .”

Lost yet? Limit yourself to two or three names. Other people can be identified by tags, like “Sam’s mother,” to simplify things for the reader or listener. And be specific. How is the relationship complicated? How does that impact the plot? Who is the book about?


4. Don’t tell them the story behind the story.

“In this book I wanted to explore the dynamics of a troubled marriage in the computer age. There are so many changes in our lives now that we’re available 24/7. We’re never without our smart phones anymore.”

But what’s the story about?


5. Don’t digress to subplots.

“Amy Pierson’s sister disappears two days before her wedding. The window to her bedroom had been broken from the outside, and a red feather was left in the middle of the floor. Then Amy’s brother announces his engagement, but his fiancee is a ditz whom no one likes and she drives to Scranton to see her ex-husband who runs a video arcade.”

Wait, wait! This one starts out well, but slides right into a side plot. Stick to the primary story. What about the sister who disappeared? That’s far more interesting than the brother’s little problem. Whether you’re querying BookEnds or pitching under pressure at Malice Go Round, remember that it’s all about telling a great story. Good luck!


Krista Davis writes the Domestic Diva Mystery series for Berkley Prime Crime. Her first book, THE DIVA RUNS OUT OF THYME, was nominated for an Agatha. Krista's most recent release is THE DIVA COOKS A GOOSE, and she's looking forward to September 6th, when her Halloween-themed mystery, THE DIVA HAUNTS THE HOUSE, will be available.

Visit Krista at her website DivaMysteries.com. Krista blogs at MysteryLoversKitchen.com, where mystery writers cook up crime . . . and recipes, and at www.KillerCharacters.com, where the characters do the blogging!

Social Networking: Twitter Needs Interesting People

I’m not an expert, but I do tend to know what I like in this world, and when it comes to Twitter I like to follow people who are interesting. Unfortunately, I see far too many authors who use Twitter as a way to inundate readers with their name or simply remind everyone to read their blog. I don’t think that works. It doesn’t work for me and I imagine it doesn’t work for others. Twitter is supposed to be interesting and, frankly, that’s just not interesting.

There’s no doubt social media is important in publishing. Heck, it’s important in all business these days, but if you’re going to do it do it well or don’t do it at all. The last thing any author needs is for people to think they’re not interesting. Trust me, you aren’t going to sell books that way.


Jessica

Workshop Wednesday

By repeated request we've started Workshop Wednesday. It will definitely play out through 2011, and beyond that we'll just have to see. We've received well over 200 queries at this point, but we are choosing at random, so don't be afraid to participate as per the guidelines in our original post.

For anyone wanting to comment, we ask that you comment in a polite and respectful manner, and we ask that you be as constructive as possible. If you can be useful to the brave souls who submitted their query and comment on the query, that's great. Please keep any anonymous tirades on publishing or other snarky comments to yourself. This is and should remain an open and safe forum for people to put themselves and their queries out there so that everyone can learn. I'm leaving comments open and open to anonymous posters, as I always have; don't make me feel the need to change that policy.

And for those who have never "met" Query Shark, get over there and do that. She's the originator of the query critique, the queen, if you will.


My 89,000 word novel of suspense, FOUR-AND-A-HALF, features a woman addicted to the advice and spurious friendship of psychics plunged into a nightmare of threats, kidnapping and murders with no idea of the reason.

This query lacks any sort of introduction, and while in the grand scheme of things that isn't a big deal, there is something to be said about easing someone into a letter or email. I like the "Dear XXX" or some other form of introduction. I feel that without an introduction your query sounds abrupt and incomplete.

Believe it or not, this description tells me absolutely nothing about your book. Using phrasing like "plunged into a nightmare of threats, kidnapping . . ." actually makes your book sound like almost any other novel of suspense. It's always better to keep your descriptions personal to your book. Introduce the character here and slow it down. For example, "Eva Stuart is addicted to psychics. Forever searching for a better life, she's hoping the psychics will help her find it. What she doesn't expect is to stumble upon the murdered body of her favorite psychic . . ."

I'll leave it to you to polish and actually make this true to the book, but I think you can see where I'm going with this.


Computer technician Eva Stuart's boredom and loneliness drives her to visit psychics in the hope they will lead her to the prince who will rescue her. But when she accidentally overhears talk of a murder while she is working on the four-and-a-half floor of City Hall and visits her personal seer, it is the seer who is murdered. Others around her are killed, and she is threatened and attacked. She flees her home but is unable to escape the danger. When she runs to her ex-lover in San Francico and he agrees to help her, they uncover a high-level conspiracy in the city for which Eva works, but their search leads the killer to target them as the next victims.

What's interesting is that this paragraph actually reads nothing like your opening. This sounds like a completely different book and that's a big problem. It makes agents wonder which is actually your story, but the inconsistency makes us wonder if the same holds true of your manuscript.

The first sentence feels like the book is leaning toward chick lit. What I would ask you about this sentence is does it matter that she's a computer technician or that she was looking for "the prince who will rescue her"? I think mentioning that she's a computer technician can be good. It does help give us some understanding of who she is. The seeking the prince thing, though, bugs me. It does feel very chick lit and the reset of your description sounds nothing like a romance, so I don't know how this fits.

The second sentence: Does it matter that she works on the "four-and-a-half floor"? Couldn't it be just the fourth floor? Does it even matter that it's City Hall? Couldn't it just be work? Okay, here's the biggest problem, though: She is visiting her personal seer at work? or she hears talk of murder while at work and visiting her seer? This sentence makes absolutely no sense. I get that she's overheard talk of murder and her seer is murdered, but this sentence is all wrong and, obviously, as an agent, my first thought is that your manuscript is equally confusing.

I think you've missed a huge part of story building when you simply drop in "others around her are killed, and she is threatened and attacked." Spend a little more time explaining this. You also say she is "unable to escape the danger" but don't show us how or give us any indication how. Spend a few more sentences building the world for us.

A conclusion would be good, too. Something to help wrap up the story. Is the manuscript ready to be sent? Do you have any writing credits? That information can be helpful.

Finally, in the end, this book just doesn't have a hook. There's nothing special about this that makes it seem like it would stand out to me.

Jessica

Plotting for You or the Story

If you ever have a pitch appointment with me, the one thing you’ll get is lots of feedback. Based on your pitch, and sometimes material I have read, I’ll do my best to give you my thoughts on why the book isn’t working and suggestions on what you can do to make it stronger, or make it work better.

I was thinking back the other day to a pitch appointment I had in which every suggestion I made, the author argued that it couldn’t be done. Ultimately, any changes I was suggesting didn’t work with her vision of the book. She had her heart and mind set on how the story was going to go, and any deviation from that carefully plotted outline was sending her into a panic.

Unfortunately, I think this is a common mistake many authors make: writing for themselves and not the story. What this means is that the author has plotted out the story and knows how she intends it to read, and now she must write the book to that end. The problem is that no matter how much of a plotter you are (versus a pantser) you can’t always control how a book is going to play out. For example, in your outline it might have made perfect sense for your character not to tell her husband that she dyes her hair until chapter 15. The problem is that by chapter 4 the reader is wondering why the hell the heroine doesn’t just tell her husband that she dyes her hair. It’s just not making sense anymore and the conflict is quickly getting old. We need it to evolve from hair dye and it’s not, because it didn’t in your outline.

So no matter how much of a planner you are, be ready for changes, drastic changes sometimes.

Jessica

Query Don'ts

There are no rules to queries. I repeat, there are no rules to queries. A query should come from you. It should be written in your voice with your own personal writing style, and it should not just tell me what your book is about, but it should wow me with your book. That being said, there are some common mistakes I see all the time, things authors do that don’t work in a query.

• Telling me what your book is not: I don’t want to hear things like, “this isn’t another Twilight,” or “I’m not writing another boring Da Vinci Code” -- that’s like sitting down in a job interview and immediately telling the potential employer that you’re not going to be another star worker, but . . . I’ve already tuned you out.
• Claiming your query is just another piece of unwanted work in my inbox: frequently authors start queries by saying things like, “the last thing you probably need is another query . . .” You’re right. It is the last thing I need, and since even you don’t think yours is important enough to stand out from the rest, I think I’ll reject
• Highlighting what doesn’t matter: I don’t care that you have three kids, are a lawyer, or play golf with George Harrison. I don’t. I care about your book and that’s really all. The rest is icing, bonus material. Don’t start your query with what really doesn’t matter. Start with the one thing you are trying to woo me with: your book.
• Themes: does your novel (note I said novel) embrace themes of philosophy, bring to light the important topic of human trafficking, or connect to readers spiritually? I don’t care. Nobody buys a piece of fiction because the cover copy says it will discuss important philosophical teachings. They don’t. They might like that they learn that from the book, but they buy the book because, well, really because someone recommends it, after that they buy a novel because they are looking to read a great story.

Jessica