This is probably not the most exciting author beware letter I have posted to date, but it has been a while and I do think they are fun. Keep in mind, as always, that all typos are taken directly from the letter. (The letter writer's comments are in italics; mine follow in brackets.)
I knew the minute I saw my SASE that it was going to be a rejection and when I saw that you used recycled paper [BookEnds letterhead is on heavy recycled paper that actually resembles our blog; apparently that’s offensive] I was shocked. I recycle too [and she did here by handwriting this note on the rejection I sent].I use toilet paper rolls as hair rollers(no lie). [Hmmm, I’m not sure what to make of that random piece of information.] I never thought I would write a novel, but everyone suggested I do so, many even telling me to go directly to the publisher. I am overwhelmed by the process and after seeing what is being published I feel the only reason I'm being rejected is because I'm inexperienced.